About a month ago I got a call from my sister that my grandpa had died (my dad's dad). I haven't talked to or seen him in about five years so I was surprised at how hard it hit me. My grandpa was an amazing man with an amazing heart. I was able to go down to California for the funeral that weekend and amazingly all my siblings (from my dad) were able to make it too, including my brother that lives in Australia. This was the first time that all my siblings have been together at the same time in like five or six years! The circumstances weren't the greatest but I had an amazing time visiting with all of them.
One of the highlights of the weekend was sitting around sharing stories about my grandpa. My favorite was how he handled my dad. It turns out that my dad was quite the wild child in his youth (so that's where I get it from). When he would do something stupid my grandpa would simply say, "did you learn something from this" to which my dad would answer yes. "OK then." That was it, that simple. Now if it happened again then obviously something was not learned and he would have to sit down and give one of his "famous" lectures. He understood that in order to grow and learn some mistakes would need to be made and a punishment isn't always necessary. I know that my dad learned to be a great dad because of my grandpa's example. If my dad hadn't learned about compassion and forgiveness we never would have been able to have the close relationship that we did when I was a teenager. Even though we weren't close in his last years I know my grandpa loved me and that he's helping to watch over me now. Grandpa I love you so much!
Brene Brown on Boundaries & Empathy
2 years ago